Is It a Nightstand or a Weapon?

Some people have guns. Others sleep with a baseball bat under their bed. I suppose that if I'm home when my house is broken into, I've got a pretty good collection of both blunt and sharp objects around I could put to use. 

But this ... this table turned beat-down kit ... will catch any intruder by surprise. So if you're super paranoid, if you live in a bad neighborhood or if you're just preparing for the zombie invasion, this is the nightstand for you. 


Complete with shield, the only thing you really need to worry about breaking the alarm clock when you sweep the table's contents onto the floor to prepare for battle.


To the inventor: pure brilliance, sir. Now, go kick some ass.